Street Harassment: Not F*cking Cool

If you're a girl (13-17) or a woman (18+) then you know how it feels to be catcalled on the street.
You know how dehumanizing it is when a strange, very aggressive male, gets in your face telling you that your ass looks nice in those jeans. You know that icky feeling that creeps up inside, that makes you feel dirty like something less than human.

You know that feeling, and its not okay!

It doesn't matter what you're wearing, it doesn't matter what time of day it is, or if you're wearing make-up, or if you're on your period; those things don't matter because there's always an asshole out there that wants to assert his own sexuality completely disregarding the fact that girl over there is a person with feelings and a self-esteem.

Why is okay for some guy to tell me that he'd love to eat my p*ssy? Why is it okay for a strange man to ambush me and tell me he'd f*ck the shit out of me? Why is it okay to reduce me to a hole?

And what happens when I say nothing, trying to ignore the neanderthal and walk away "Oh, you can't talk? You know what you're a fucking bitch". And what happens when I try to defend myself "You got a mouth on you, you're a rude c*nt, fuck you, you're ugly anyways". Oh. I guess you're into ugly girls then, right?

So, what these men are telling me with these reactions is that its ok for a strange man to yell obscenities at me, be disrespectful, and vulgar, and when I don't give him what he wants he has a right to then be extremely aggressive and even more disrespectful, because you know women are only here for the sexual gratification of men!

These types of encounters happen to all women they can look like Gisele Bunchen, then can look like Rosie O'Donnell, it doesn't matter, catcalling and street harassment are never about courtship, its about men wanting to be abusive towards women in a way that they will always have the advantage. What do I mean by that?

Many men and many women believe that all is fine and dandy in our society and that there's no need for feminism anymore. Really? What rose coloured world are you living in, because women are still fighting an uphill battle.

Because when its 1:30am and you're sitting on the train and its just you and a man, alone in a car, you mean to tell me that the thought of you having to defend yourself against him hasn't crossed your mind? You mean to tell me that you aren't a little on edge, just in case he is that type of person? You mean you haven't looked at the alert button just once, preparing yourself, on some level, that you will have to fight?

Or when you're in an underground parking lot at 11pm its just you and another man walking in the same direction to your cars; you don't look over your shoulder to make sure he's not right behind you? You don't walk a little slower so that he can be in front of you so you know where he is? You don't get your keys ready in the elevator so you can get into your car as quickly as possible or if it comes to it, stab him in the eye?

Don't lie to me and don't lie to yourselves, these are the survival strategies that women employ everyday, and if there wasn't a need for feminism, I wouldn't have to call my brother to meet me at the bus stop because some creep won't stop staring at me.

Many, MANY, men don't see that there's anything wrong with telling a woman she looks sexy while she's walking down Yonge street, except that they're not trying to get her number, they're not trying to get to know her, they know that its not going to get them a date, so why do it? Why do you have to verbalize the feeling in your pants? Why reduce a woman to her vagina?

Still don't see anything wrong with it, dear XY'ers? Here's a social experiment for you to try and then email me the results:

On a Friday or Saturday, get ready however you would when you're getting reading to go to the clubs. Put on that tight Affliction t-shirt, or that fancy Ed Hardy button up. Pull on your best distressed jeans. Wear your niftiest leather kicks from Aldo. Spike that hair with gel and pomade. Slap on that cologne you believe attracts the ladies the best. Then, on your own, venture down to your local gay village and on your own, walk down the entertainment strip. Note the reactions you get from just being a dude, alone, walking down the street. Record the feelings that are welling up inside of you. Then answer these simple questions: Did that feel good? Did you feel sexy? Is that something you would like to happen to you over and over again? Did those reactions awaken any sort of desire that would propel you to actually engage with those catcallers?

Methinks most of you will be too chicken to try, and if the thought of the above event happening to you makes you uncomfortable well maybe you should consider the way that girl in the sundress feels next time you want to tell her that you 'bet she tastes good' or the way that woman who's all sweaty from yoga class feels when you tell her, you like the way those pants makes her ass look.

Its not okay! Its not okay when I'm wearing a sparkly dress from Le Chateau, its not okay when I'm in track pants. I'm more than your orgasm. I'm more than my vagina. I'm a daughter, sister, friend, lover, citizen of Canada, user of public pools, fan of Leonard Cohen.

Recognize that I, like all women, have a self esteem, have opinions, have hopes and aspirations! Recognize that you have absolutely no right to reduce us to a c*m dumpster just because your ego/libido needs a boost.

Still think there's no need for feminism? Yeah.Okay.